CONTROL ISSUES

Just before Christmas when I was 7 years old my dad died and I experienced a life altering paradigm shift.  It was as if the curtains closed at the end of an act on the stage of my life and when they reopened, the scenery had completely changed leaving me feeling unsafe and bewildered.  As a result, I can rationalize, deny and forget anything.  It is a mechanism I employed to make sense my unfathomable reality.  It helped me survive the grief and terror that threatened my sanity for decades and felt life threatening.  I thought I was safe in my head even though I knew on some subconscious level that I didn’t feel safe.  This ‘survival’ mechanism carried me until I was 35 years old when it backfired for the last time.

At the age of 35 I experienced another paradigm shift.  I could no longer escape my reality. I had to embark on that treacherous journey from my head, where I rationalized my experiences, to my heart, where I began realizing them.  When I ‘surrendered’ and began processing my crippling feelings of grief, rage, shame, resentment, etc., something amazing happened.  I learned that the seemingly miraculous solution to any of my ‘problems’ is contained within my deepest fears! When I began to feel the feelings I had resisted, I made some critical discoveries:

  1. That which I resist persists.
  2. My emotions won’t kill me.
  3. Emotions are simply energy in motion.

    EMOTION = Energy in Motion

  4. My emotions they cannot pass if I resist/deny/stuff/block them.
  5. When I feel my feelings, I can release them and drop my ‘baggage.’
  6. Once I process the emotion, I discover that “peace that passes all understanding” rationally.
  7. Established in this peace of mind I am able to and I want to stay in present moment awareness.
  8. The Intelligence and the Power that creates worlds exists only in the present moment.
  9. Connected to that Power – my fears slip away and I gain ‘control’ of my life.
  10. When I feel a constricting emotion it is my sign that I am shutting down, resisting my experience, and cutting myself off from the Power to change that  undesirable experience .
  11. When I accept the experience as it is, I return to the present and the Power it has.  A feeling of expansion results.
  12. The ‘control’ (over my thoughts, words, deeds and experiences) that I craved was in my Awareness all along!
  13. As long as I was looking for that Power and Control over my life ‘out there,’ it would remain illusive.
  14. This EOS  (Emotional Operating System) is my infallible IGS – Internal Guidance System.  If I remain aware and pay attention to it, it will guide me to the life of my dreams and deepest desires.

I can think of many examples in life when I ignored the wisdom of my IGS and paid a steep price.  One obvious example was in my early twenties when I took a job as a mortgage-backed securities bond broker.  I was about to become the only woman on a dog-eat-dog bond-trading floor.  I had many reasons for taking the job despite a nagging ‘sinking’ feeling.  I was unable to show up for my first week on the job because I had colitis, which in retrospect was my IGS on overdrive, desperately trying to get my attention.  I had stuffed every emotion that surfaced before and after taking the job because I was in survival mode.  I felt that I had to stuff the grief associated with selling my soul to survive because I believed I had to take that job.  The disease I developed as a result of my dis-ease with my decision forced me stop physically.  But since I refused to stop mentally long enough to just be in the present moment, I delayed my discovery of true Power.

I was extremely ‘successful” and convinced myself that I was in control (happy, safe and secure).  I went on compromising my integrity for years saying and doing things that made me so uncomfortable I could hardly stand in my skin…another feeling I worked at denying !  Every year it became more difficult to contain all the trapped energy of my repressed emotions.  Finally at age 35, I reached the tipping point. Choices I made (albeit unconsciously) resulted in a situation that I would typically have denied, but at that particular moment, I could not house another emotion without imploding.  As a result, I accepted reality in the moment and suddenly, in touch with true Power, all my walls collapsed instantly and I stepped into this new miraculous paradigm.

Advertisements

NASH FLASH

RELATIONSHIPS REFLECT

 

 Everywhere you go, there YOU are!

 

The quality of our relationships with others reflects the quality of our relationship with ourSelves.  If our relationships feel good, it is because we have a strong connection with our Source, our IGS (Internal Guidance System). As always, the reverse it true.  The only change, which can favorably impact any of our relationships, must occur within ourselves.

 

 Watch my blog for a link to my podcast discussing this in depth!

 

 

 

WHO ARE YOU?

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

 

 

 

JUST RELEASED – THE ULTIMATE EXPERT Podcast # 4

I believe that under all of your formal education and social conditioning, you have an inner expert that knows what’s best for you. YOU are the ultimate expert, and this is your podcast. It’s free, it’s fun, and this week’s episode is available right now. Click on the image to listen to Episode 4

  Now Playing: Episode 4: Brandon Farrell

– OVERCOMING FRUSTRATION –

20-year-old Brandon Farrell asks about being able to control his emotions. A valuable conversations about living a meaningful life of our choosing ensues.

Week 1: TOOLS – What You Need to Know

“Knowledge has infinite organizing power.”

−Deepak Chopra

I will be posting some important points to ponder over the coming days as you expect my next video blog, when I will introduce the first tool/discipline required to gain control over your thoughts, words and deeds:

The first point: THOUGHTS ARE NOT FACTS.

The brain is a non-conscious organ that functions like a computer processing ONLY what it can with the programs  installed on it.  If the brain has not been given the software to process information (through formal education and/or socializing), it computes the material as nonsense, much like a pc would read a Word document without the Microsoft Word™ program installed. The document is not nonsense simply because our pc doesn’t have the programming to understand it.  It is, however, nonsense to dismiss the document as nonsense!  There are many ways to compensate for different operating systems and programs so that the facts on the page, which remain absolute regardless of processor, are comprehensible by all.  Likewise, when we judge others and dismiss their opinions and actions, we are the fools.  Their experience is very real for them and we may miss some valuable information if we don’t make the effort to bridge the gap between our different programming and conditioning/socializing.

What are some examples of this phenomenon that you have experienced? Have you ever changed your mind?  Have you ever strongly disagreed with someone (your parents, perhaps) and marveled at your alignment with them years later?  If you have ever once changed your mind, you  know that believing you are right about anything is not sound.

Another example is religious disdain or worse yet, intolerance.  The fact that a religion works for one group of people doesn’t indicate that no other religion is has value; yet, we see countless examples of judgments without thorough comprehension.

When we are ‘unteachable,’ closed-minded or attached to the way things have always been, we subject ourselves to varying degrees of limitation, irrelevance and isolation as if we refuse to upgrade various hardware or software for a computer.  This is true for the most intelligent of as well as the least!  I saw a conversation on Larry King between Stephen Hawkin and Deepak Chopra and realized that for all of his genius, Stephen Hawking was actually dismissing Deepak Chopra’s claims because they had not been his experience.  Additionally, he had never even tried to gain that experience!

We must be open to the experiences of others, challenge our comfort zone, and  embrace change to evolve.  I’m not sure where I first heard this expression, but I sure do love it:

“When I am alone in my mind, I am in enemy territory.”

−Unknown

Lesson from Job(s)

It is our great fortune to have witnessed the personification of so many Truths in the life and achievements or Steve Jobs.  His iconic legacy will be available for all to draw upon when illustrating Natural Law, the governing principles of Creation.  His larger-than-life demonstration of The Power of Pure Potential (aka the Power within), The Power of Intention (focus), The Power of Self-Referral (not accepting conventional wisdom), The Power of  Visualization (imagination), The Powers of Simplicity and  Boldness (‘just do it’), The Power of Detachment (from fear, from the outcome, from the known) brought us closer to understanding that while human, we are also super-human.  If we allow ourselves to seize these Powers, move out of the illusion of safety of our comfort zone and venture forth into the realization of our seemingly miraculous potential, we can, like Steve Jobs, achieve anything we can conceive and believe.
Jobs, sadly, also demonstrated the results of violating these Laws.  Stories of his impertenance are sprinkled throughout accounts of his creative prowess.  In addition to his micro-managing (controlling? autocratic?) leadership style, he was known to belittle people, seek revenge, and harbor grudges.  Whether he was ignorant, defiant or disdainful of such fundamental Laws as The Power of Love, The Power of Attraction, The Power of Compassion, and The Power of Forgiveness, Steve Jobs has left us a few poignant examples of  what happens when we believe we are the Power or that immutable Natural Laws don’t pertain to us.  It is impossible to fool Mother Nature.  We will always reap what we sow.  Pumpkin seeds will never bring forth cherries.  Imagine if he was able to weave the Power of Potential & The Power of Intention with The Powers of Love & Compassion and the Powers of Attraction & Purpose.  He may have inspired the realize-ation of boundless Potential within those he employed.  Empowering others motivated by an absolute trust in the Power of Love without any attachment to the outcome (e.g. not fearing that Knowledge or information is dangerous or belief that your investment in another  may not pay returns) must buoy the leader/teacher exponentially.  It is Law.
Additionally, had he chosen to empower and inspire rather than intimidate, the inescapable Law of Attraction is likely to have drawn far less toxicity to his life experience and perhaps the potential for disease encoded in his DNA could have remained un-real-ized, dormant.  Nature does not compartmentalize; neither do we.  It is impossible!  We cannot have one kind of thought and a different kind of body.  Your body will reflect, measurably, whether you are stressed, angry, grateful or loving, etc.  Make sure that that you employ the Power of Love in all of your intentions, interactions and creations.  The Law of Attraction says we receive back the energy we emit multiplied on all levels – physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.  Do you want back what you are giving out?  How would you like it on steroids?

Free Introduction to Meditation

Sunday, October 30, 2011  

The Center for Relaxation & Healing  Chatham,NJ

Alternatively, you may join us live via teleconference.

You choose!  Simply make your selection on the registration page. The details of the teleconference can be found when you register.  Please feel free to invite as many friends as you like and forward this announcement to anyone yoiu know that may benefit from this information.

Stressed?  Anxious?

OverloadOver-thinking?  Angry?  Pressured?

  • Learn why meditation is so important for well-being and peace of mind.
  • Decide whether level one or leveltwo is the most appropriate choice for you:
    1. Simply and effectively change the way you feel employing various medataive relaxation techniques.
    2. Discover the seemingly miraculous, life-changing benefits of a formal meditation practice.
  • 30 minutes will be devoted to Q&A and/or guided meditation as time allows.

Register Now!